If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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