Sorry, I don't speak sober.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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