I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
