yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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