let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I love you. Go after that dick
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
