so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
as a side note pls kill me
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
