Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
