I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
