I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
