Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
