awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
