Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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