i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
