i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
