I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
