Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Bring me that man meat
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
