hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Life is so much better after having sex.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
