Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
