You're so nebulous sometimes
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Randomize
