There is no way he is gay with that hair.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
people are starting to question the shark bite story
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
