i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
