Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize
