At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
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