glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
