I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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