If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize