google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
