Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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