Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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