I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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