Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
is wine microwaveable?
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
