We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
