What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
