Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
