My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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