I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I want you more than these girls want KFC
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Everything about him screamed your future.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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