I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Randomize