He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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