When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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