I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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