Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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