no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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