we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
