Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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