Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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