Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
