he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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