My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize