Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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