They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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